You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever started out your Saturday morning shift on Reference with an emergency 911 call.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever feared you were going to be lynched because the public internet computers lost their internet for 25 minutes.

The trick here is to make phone calls and run around looking busy to keep the residents of the computer center convinced that you're actually DOING something while waiting for the internet fairies to stop messing with your world.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever been thrilled to introduce a 10-year-old to the wonders of microfilmed newspapers from the 1930s. And then, when you went back to check on the budding researcher, you notice that the daily comic strip Tarzan in those newspapers is being read day by day.

Meanwhile, to balance out the good, someone reports someone else using one of the public internet computers is viewing porn. Yep, nothing like looking a pictures of sex while in public with the monitor turned so the whole library can see. Creep.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if, in your first hour on the Ref Desk on Saturday 16 April 2011, you've had to decline to give tax advice to two people, and pointed out to two others that just because they printed the preview of their tax return efile, they have not, in fact, efiled.

Remind me to not volunteer for tax day Ref Desk again.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...you've ever acknowledged that one of your regular patrons grew up in Italy, and he starts leaving Italian recipes at the Ref Desk for you. Unsolicited recipes.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever been asked to proofread someone's resume. And the very first thing you want to say is that they have GOT to ditch the coat of arms as decorative background image for the contact info.

It's distracting, low contrast so the details are harder to read, and just plain weird.

Unless, of course, you're applying for one of those high-demand jobs relating to heraldry, I suppose.

Your change, sir.

While I was dropping off materials to another librarian's desk, someone left $0.86 on the Ref Desk to pay for printing. It's $0.10 per page.

Now I'm stuck trying to decide if that was for 60% of a page, or if we just got screwed by $0.04.