You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever had to explain to a patron that even though they clicked "Buy now" on Amazon for a particular ebook, they don't actually OWN the ebook if the gift card on the Amazon account has a balance of $0.00.

...if you've ever had a patron complain about a baby crying on another floor of the building.

"Well, it sounds like the baby is in the bathroom, so maybe it's being changed. I'm sure it will stop shortly."
"I'm a mother of five, and NONE of my babies EVER screamed like that during a changing!"

At this point, I very carefully did not say, 'As a mother of five, I'm surprised you have no tolerance for a crying baby. Surely you can relate to the parent, and can understand how useless it is for you to get pissy about a very natural part of being an infant?'

...if you've ever gotten excited about an email reference question because it actually took a little creative research to answer--you pull out multiple types of reference materials, trace the development of an idea, and document your findings in a detailed and informative email. And then, the next day, you find a four word reply. "thank you very much"

Ahh well, I guess we can't all be poets...

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever had a patron come up to you to read an article about a pit bull attack.

That was the entire exchange.

You may be a reference librarian if...

...if you've ever had a "discussion" with a patron about the temperature.

"The cashier at the shop next door told me it had gotten up to -8 degrees!"

My internal monologue: There's no way it's that cold out. It was only supposed to get down into the single digits overnight, and the news this morning wasn't gushing about freakish coldness.

So, being a now-curious information professional, I clicked my handy link to the weather page.

"I don't know where the cashier got the number, but it's +9 degrees now. No, actually, that update is an hour old."

"Oh, maybe it got colder since then."

Internal monologue again: Yes, I'm sure that's it. The temperature dropped 17 degrees in 54 minutes, and the authority for that information is a cashier at a bakery and not the National Weather Service...

Either way, it's pretty danged chilly. Even in celsius.